Tag Archives: Disney

Family Meetings

Does your family have family meetings? We started doing it a few years ago and the kids really enjoy them. Our favorite meetings are usually held on my bed and anyone is allowed to call one at any given time. Everyone is allowed to speak freely during the meeting and we encourage that the children say exactly how they are feeling. It’s very important not to judge or discipline someone for something they may say during the meeting because it really is a great chance to hear and understand just how each family member is feeling on a regular basis. Use what is said to improve the dynamics of your family and how it works. Remind each other during the meetings that you are all on the same team and the goal is to reach a happy and healthy living environment. Parents prepare yourselves as you may be surprised by some of the things your child has to say. They have become so natural in our home that we look forward to someone shouting “Family Meeting” and we all quickly gather to see what’s going on. WE recently had one just a few nights ago as moving into our new home and all the holiday chaos that was going on I wanted to remind my kids that these meetings and there input are still an important part of our family. I was able to stress the fact that school would be starting back very soon and that I was expecting a better performance behaviorally from both of them. My son expressed that he is not so keen to hear me use a profanity on occasion and I myself will have to work on that. My daughter had us laughing as she took her turn. Her response to my question “What do you think I can do to be a better mom?” was “Well you are doing a really good job and I think that if you could let us celebrate Hanukkah that would make you a much better mom.” I proceeded to inform her about Hanukkah and let her know that we weren’t Jewish and it wouldn’t be right to celebrate a holiday that’s not actually ours. My guess was she was totally down for the daily gifts that would have been received. She is 6 and responded with “well my cousin is Jewish” I then had to explain that it still didn’t make us Jewish.
So think of a few questions and call a family meeting. These meetings should never only be focused on the things that others are doing wrong and I often start them with a few compliments of what improvements that each family member has made to set the tone as relaxed and then we ease into anything that may be bothering us about each other. Now obviously there are a few things that you may want to talk about privately with your spouse/significant other privately away from the children in order to keep your relationship on track. Remember to start off with a few things you enjoy about each other and ease into the things that might be bothering you or causing stress and ill will in your relationships.
At the end of the day we all need to be reminded that we are on the same team and relationships need constant work. If you forget to water your plants on a regular basis they die. Don’t kill your relationships with lack of communication.

DIY Kids Containers

My daughter is a big mess maker. Some days it seems as if she is happiest surrounded by clutter. It drives me crazy. I have tried endless solutions to try to get her to contain her messes.

One of my biggest pet peeves is her homework, coloring, and after school mess.
My house could be spotless and two minutes after she arrives home from school she has pens, pencils, colored pencils, and markers everywhere.

I came up with the idea to try to make something cute that would appeal to her and help contain her mess.
As I went to toss out an empty Coffee Container it hit me. I could transform this at a very small cost.

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So I cleaned out the Coffee Container. Grabbed some Clorox wipes and wiped it down. Then grabbed some of my summer spruce up go to Spray Paint and got busy.

After it dried I located a few cute Disney Stickers I had laying around and added them to the container.

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The end result was very attractive to her eye. It matches the colors of her bedroom scheme and at the same time holds all her crafting clutter.

I will be saving more containers in the future as they become empty and making one for my son and using them for other clutter messes that get acquired in our household.

Nobody Cares Go Harder

I’ve always been honest and open about my child’s struggles in life. We are not ashamed of them and we share our struggles openly. No child comes with a handbook but I do try to provide one for mine. I recently blogged about our Back to School Nightmare Well big surprise (note my sarcasm) the school is now having trouble handling my child. Although I tried my best to provide somewhat of a handbook for my son they rejected it and have now decided that I’m just simply ‘doing it wrong’ I have been feeling the pressure of being forced to be a parent that I don’t want to be. They are shoving unsolicited ‘suggestions’ in parenting down my throat. It’s actually not just them society itself feels the need to point out what they think I am doing wrong although its a known fact that my child has less struggles at home than anywhere else. If my son is having a bad day at school and simply “just wants to be at home and is missing home” they are suggesting that home is a candyland filled with no rules, no consequences, and that I just provide to much comfort, fun, and love.
The last few days I have been struggling emotionally as I question myself. Did I miss something along the way in my quest to be a not just a good parent but a great one? Isn’t it our goal as parents to give our children such a good home environment that that’s their favorite place to be. I understand that Disney claims the title of ‘The Happiest Place on Earth’ but my kids have never been there and I was actually quite content in knowing that home is their happy place.
I gave in and tried this form of what I call socially expected parenting. I gave harsher consequences to my children’s actions. I stuck with them. I offered only the praise that was suggested. I set stricter rules. I became this stern no nonsense parent. I even spanked one time. I now feel traumatized from it. I hated every second of it. None of it felt right and it made our lives miserable. For three days home was not a happy place and I am emotionally exhausted. If this is how society expects me to parent I cant do it and I don’t want my kids to ever live like that.
Today I am taking our lives back. I am giving back the handbook that society gave me and going back to my own. I will not punish my child for something he did at school. I will encourage him to do the right thing while there and reward him when he does. I cant feel good about punishing him for something related to his disabilities while he is out of my care. I don’t expect school to enforce any punishment for things that happen at home. Home and school are two different places and both have different expectations. Sure the general ones are the same but our home is our sanctuary and I am not willing to give that up. I apologize if my child wants to be home. I have always taken that as a compliment in the past and don’t appreciate school making me question myself as if it were a bad thing.
Now some might say “I was raised that way and I turned out just fine” Well let me be the first to say I was raised that way and it took years of therapy for me to be ‘just fine’ If it makes me a bad parent and its socially unacceptable for me to use a Conscious Parenting form of parenting then so be it. My kids are happy and so am I. I would rather tell my child a thousand things I love about them in a day than focus on the one mistake they made in the day. I prefer to give them rewards instead of taking things away from them. I would rather do the fun project that we had planned instead of turning it into a punishment by not allowing we do it because a mistake was made 6 hours before. I would rather talk about the mistake that was made instead of dishing out a spanking.
Maybe the problem is in society and not with me? Maybe society is so stuck in the ‘nobody cares go harder’ to get the desired results mindset that they are missing the point entirely. Maybe I care and maybe just wanna go softer and reach the same destination but be happy along my road in getting there. At the end of the day I prefer to raise a happy conscious child than one who is more focused on being socially acceptable. Right now society is just not acceptable to me.